One Thing I Learned at Kagan Training!

I was two years old but didn't speak a single word until my mother purchased a doll who spoke when her string was pulled.  I wasn't neglected. I just hadn't used language to express myself yet.  I seemed smart enough, my mother says, so she wasn't too worried, but she bought the doll as a bit of encouragement. My mother got more than she expected. I pulled the doll's string one time and began speaking in complete sentences.

My mother's patience and gentle encouragement paid off--I'm still speaking to this very day!

My mother shared this story with me only a month ago. Here's something else I've learned about myself recently--I'm a circle!

That's what I learned during one of the introductory group tasks at a Kagan workshop last summer. Asked to choose a shape that represents my personality, I chose the circle from among the square, rectangle, and triangle. Now in groups we shared why we chose that shape. I spoke last. Introverts usually do. We are much more likely to share our hearts and engage in deeper level conversation, so I spent some time explaining my choice. How I like taking care of other people. How I'm always trying to include others and make them feel valued and appreciated. How I value what everyone I work with thinks of me.

The facilitator saved the description of the circle for last--I just figured they were saving the best for last.

The facilitator then gave a brief warning: "You may not want to use this personality test with your own students." I slump down in my seat. "Circles might get embarrassed and teased."  My heart's beating a bit faster. With a grin on his face, the facilitator announced, "Circles are very passionate people--very sensual!" I heard chuckles in the room. I could't believe I'd just become a target of a joke at a workshop that promotes collaborative conversations in the classroom. My three group members looked toward me. One said, "Hey, way to go."

My husband attended that same training. I told him how embarrassing and inappropriate it was.  He told me that he was a circle, too. Now you know the secret to our incredible marriage!

Don't get me wrong. Kagan training is amazing. I was able to put that awkward moment behind me because of my passion for helping students find their voices. The content of the workshop mattered so much to me that I shook of this uncomfortable moment.

What if I'm a teacher who decided to use that same personality test in her classroom--a reproducible page is in Kagan's teaching materials? If I'd been back in high school and a teacher had done this to me, I'd have lost all trust with that teacher. Want me to share with my partners on the next task? Absolutely not. I may go through the motions and share surface level answers but I'm not sharing my heart like that again.

Our goal is to promote safe, trustworthy environments. Introverts never want to be the butt of any joke. Trust me, we feel awkward enough already.

We want to speak. We just need to know it's safe to do so.